


Illegal in Nine Countries

by Mab (Mab_Browne)



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, M/M, Sentinel Thursday
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 21:49:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17149697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mab_Browne/pseuds/Mab
Summary: Jim and Blair watchAnchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundyat the movies. They both have opinions.





	Illegal in Nine Countries

**Author's Note:**

> I found reference to sex panther cologne while wandering the web and naturally had to track the reference to its source, namely the movie Anchorman. I'm not really the target demographic but I got a story idea anyway. The prompt was 'damage', and (as per usual) this is gently edited from its original post.

The truck was on the upper level of the parking garage where it was quieter and both their footsteps and their words echoed to Jim’s ears. Blair was too busy defending his choice of movie to notice the echo even if he could have.

“Come on, it wasn’t that bad.”

“A tired bunch of rehashed sitcom jokes. The actors are all talented, I’ll give you that, but sometimes that just makes it worse.”

“Who died and made you Ebert, Jim?”

“You asked my opinion, I told you.”

“It had some decent gags, you have to admit that. In fact…” and Blair chortled, as if something was too funny to put into words. 

“Sandburg, tell me you aren’t sniggering your ass off at the sex panther cologne thing. Again.”

“Well, it did seem kind of apropos.”

Jim’s determination to defend his movie opinions moved up a notch. “Apropos. The scene where the guy is wearing something that smells like Big Foot’s dick is… apropos. I’m pretty sure I don’t want to know.”

Blair did something complicated with his shoulders and hands to indicate that Jim was wrong, wrong, wrong. “It’s the panther thing, man, it’s just interesting how it comes up in our lives. The Jags, spirit animals-“

“Frat humor jokes about cologne.” Maybe Jim might be prepared to admit to himself that he was getting sharper than was justified by some stupid movie, but only to himself, not to Blair.

“Sometimes an idea just digs in, and you should explore it because otherwise all that happens is that it gets repressed.”

“Maybe some things should be repressed.”

“What’s your damage, man? If you repress something, it lurks in the subconscious waiting to pounce. Like a panther.” Blair was clearly far too pleased with the imagery. “Better to get it out of your system, explore all the associations.”

“Would you like to be doing the pants dance in about an hour?”

Blair choked with laughter again. “Yeah, sure. Although I’m sensing a proviso here.”

“Get it out of your system fast, Chief.”

A look of dawning and still amused epiphany appeared on Blair’s face. “Jim, I promise, hand on heart, that any of my personal associations with sex panther concepts, especially in relation to you, are entirely positive, okay?”

Oh, ouch. Was it that simple?

“Entirely positive, huh?”

Well, this was embarrassing.

“Works sixty per cent every time.” Blair’s face was still lit with his silly mood, but there was an earnest element that soothed Jim. However even if his nose had been metaphorically rubbed in the source of his irritation with Blair, Jim still firmly held to his overall opinion that this evening’s movie was _not_ entering the annals of classic comedy.

“And that makes no sense.”

“Which was the point of the joke, man.” Blair moved in, (smooth as silk but it was easy to be smooth with an easy target) and clasped one arm around Jim’s waist. He squeezed with a motion of both lust and affection. “So if I promise not to belabor the point any further, could I hope for some action that might be illegal in nine countries?”

“Oh my god, you never give up, do you?”

“My persistence is legendary.”

“You’d better hope my patience is too.”

“Well, I’m still living with you, so I think we have the evidence right there.” There was another hopeful squeeze around his waist and Jim relented from movie criticism enough to lift his arm to Blair’s shoulder for an encouraging squeeze of his own.

“Illegal in nine countries, huh? Let me do some mental review there, Chief, and see what I can come up with.”


End file.
